skylineaddict

Seriously.. It's like every girl I ask out or even slightly like treats me with a cold indifference.. Much like a rich fella would ignore starving kids in Africa.. But that's a tangent I don't wish to go on. I wouldn't normally complain about this to anyone, but since I have some anonymity here, I figured why not?

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Couldn't come up with anything snappy to say, so I'll just be awkward.

Judas

several reasons, just as much of which is actually not your fault or your problem but rather theirs.


People today are overly demanding, picky and looking for others for the wrong reasons. Peoples ideals and values and overall morals are twisted and jaded in a way that either suites their own world and understanding or tries to suite whomever they may be interested in. Some people don't try at all and just as many are trying way to damn hard.

Another factor is the coming realization that women are more equal then others tend to realize or want to admit, and it's getting to the point where their power is actually started to exceed that, strange how things tend to come to balance only to work up enough power to completely reverse "to far" what it was initially intended to do, it's like the snowball effect, once it gets rolling sometimes it's unable to be stopped.

I'm not placing blame on women in general and i'm not a sexist asshole either, considering the fact that i've 3 sisters and they are fully aware of this very issue as well, now that women have power of their own and don't feel the need for the man to be the bread winner or the instagator (which i applaud) there are men that still demand it and want the traditionalistic ways yet, and there are women that want that too but just as many that are completely against that..

We in this world, really do not know what we want anymore, but we also want it whatever it is right away. Patients has been thrown out for the most part and so have countless other values in the process.... some of it for good some of it not.

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IvanV

Could be that you're going after the wrong kind of girls. How many girls did you ask out over the last year anyway?

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If anyone has Portal 2 and hasn't played the co-op and wants to do me a favour, let me know (PM me or whatever).

craig5320

Go for a bigger lady. They're not as fast.

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HardwareHeaven on Facebook

skylineaddict

About 6. They were all of different class and/or attractiveness levels. 3 of them were really pretty, the other three, less than pretty. One was an aspiring nun (Not really, I just want to point out how religious she is), one was as an avid an atheist as me, one was really popular, and one not as much, one was a snob, and one was the nicest girl you'll ever meet, one was rich, and one was on my financial level, and the one I'm going for now is in the middle ground with everything except prettiness.. She's absolutely stunning.

I know you're just joking around, and I will sound like an ass for saying this, but I don't like bigger women..

And Judas, I have sisters too. They kinda helped shaped my view of what girls want in general. Most of my lady friends back up that view, and I will tell you straight up, I fit into that image as well as a triangle fits in a circle.

So yeah, the common factor is me.. I wonder what I'm doing wrong. I don't flash my talents around, I'm always a gentleman, I'm nice to pretty much everyone I know, and I'm not wild or crazy.. Should I be the total opposite and just turn into a total ass? That seems to get ladies these days.

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Couldn't come up with anything snappy to say, so I'll just be awkward.

IvanV

You sound not too much unlike me.

If you're a nice and quiet guy, you probably have the best chance with girls who are themselves nice and quiet (that doesn't mean you shouldn't go after any girl you like, though, just that you're probably more likely to find a date in a library than in a club). Also, don't be afraid to show off a little bit. Good posture and a bit of self confidence can go a long way, plus we all know that you have at least one relatively rare talent (or two if we count the sexy voice ). And don't hesitate too much when you're interested in someone, being a quiet guy and a gentleman, I'm guessing that girls tend to see you more as a friend than as a potential date, so when you meet a new girl, you need to act before she's definitely listed you among friends.

That reminded me of a conversation between a friend of mine and the best friend of a girl he was into:
she (speaking of her friend): She told me the other day that you're such a sweetie.
he: Oh yeah? Well you tell her I called her a whore!
she (shocked): You don't really mean that?!
he: Of course not, but if she thinks I'm a sweetie, than I don't stand a chance in hell with her.

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If anyone has Portal 2 and hasn't played the co-op and wants to do me a favour, let me know (PM me or whatever).

Neshi

that's probably the major thing. It kinda goes up for me as well, as I tend to wait too long with things like that before i 'dare' to make my move..

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If one does not attach himself to people and desire, never shall his heart be broken. But then, does he ever truly live?

Life is just too damn short for if's and maybe's

skylineaddict

Well, I guess I'll just have to try with this girl as hard as I can, because it's probably my last chance to get a date for V Day.. Eh, dating is a bitch for guys. Girls got it easy.

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Couldn't come up with anything snappy to say, so I'll just be awkward.

IvanV

Incidentally, todays episode of "Girls with Slingshots" is exactly about that



Don't give too much significance to "V Day". Also, guy's trying too hard is one of the things that often puts the girl off. Make your intentions clear, but don't go silly. How exactly are you supposed to do that? That's difficult to explain and I probably wouldn't be the right person to do it anyway.

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If anyone has Portal 2 and hasn't played the co-op and wants to do me a favour, let me know (PM me or whatever).

skylineaddict

You're probably better at it than most of my friends. See, I have friends that either only fuck women, or never date women, so I'm in a very bad power struggle. I'm too much of a gentleman to take the woman-fucker-only friend's advice, even though they do get a helluvalot more dates than I do.

Also, I'm not giving significance to V-Day. Honestly, I think it's a load of bullshit, but that isn't why I'm looking for a date. The reasons stem a lot deeper, and I could pretty much guarantee a date if I told the girl those reasons, but it's just not right to use reasons such as the one I have, even if it isn't made up.

So fire away Ivan, I'm gonna need all the help I can get .

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Couldn't come up with anything snappy to say, so I'll just be awkward.

Falstaff

I tend to agree and there is more to love.

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anonemus

@skyline -- we'll you certainly won't get a date at HH. Have you tried hanging out in different forum where there are more women?

In my experience, the key word here is healthy self-confidence

IvanV

I'm afraid that, rather than an exact science, getting a girl to pay attention to you and not overdoing it is more of an art. You try and gather experience so you don't repeat old mistakes.

Be confident, that's the key, that way you won't be seen as a beggar, to use your own parallel from the first post, and girls will give you more respect (in the absence of a better word). Don't despair, don't think "Oh, I shouldn't have said that!" or "I blew it now...", just keep going. When you're at a party (or some other social event) with a girl you like, don't just run around her. Mingle with people. Girls find you immeasurably more interesting when they see other girls showing interest in you (disclaimer: while you are mingling with people, there is a possibility that someone else is going to come and chat up your girl). If she's seeing you alone on the other hand, chances are that you're already half way there.

As for your current girl, don't use blackmail and, if you want a relationship, don't go for pity. Anything else should be fair enough.

And as for one night stands and purely physical relationships, if you don't want them that's fine, but, unless you lead a girl to falsely believe that there is more than that, there is nothing particularly ungentlemanly in them. They won't teach you how to maintain a relationship, but they may give you more confidence when encountering a girl you're interested in. And who says you can't ever call them and see them again? That way you can learn how to talk and behave to girls who aren't and shouldn't become your friends (and that is a lot easier when you're not really that much into a girl).

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If anyone has Portal 2 and hasn't played the co-op and wants to do me a favour, let me know (PM me or whatever).

Optix

This is going to sound as cheesy as you can get but as soon as you stop looking you will find them.

Live for yourself, enjoy life and when you least expect it...

*BAM!*

...the girl of your dreams will blindside you.

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BlueMak

Do you have something that could affect a woman's decision about dating you?
Some of the factors that can change your chances are:
Over-under weight.
Height.
Skin issues.
As far away from uniform and symmetrical head/face.
Poor.
Odors (you might not even be aware of), including mouth and body.
Way of dressing.
Too shy or too assertive.
Ugly. (yes subjective, but...)
Too...beautiful (having a face that looks like you prefer to suck cock is not always the most attractive feature, but there are exceptions)
Do you have a "thing"? Something that immediately makes someone think of when your name is mentioned or when they see you. It might not be as cool as you think.
Are you homosexual? (seriously, many young men and women do not even know it, drive away the opposite sex because the others can sense it) If yes, try same sex dates.
Do you know when to stop talking?
Do you know when to stop being a pussy?
Do you know when to ask a girl out? (asking a girl out while she can be seen/watched by her friends means instant death to your chances if they are not already 110% win)
Do you ask a girl out and mention to her how the other girls said no?
If all fails, there is always "next year", or if you are not underage you can hire a hooker. The second is more fun in the end, but the first is fine too.

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The people who are regarded as moral luminaries are those who forego ordinary pleasures themselves and find compensation in interfering with the pleasures of others(Bertrand Russell)"You go into Afghanistan, you got guys who slap women around for five years because they didn't wear a veil,You know, guys like that ain't got no manhood left anyway. So it's a hell of a lot of fun to shoot them." - Lt. Gen. James N. Mattis
This is slavery, not to speak one's thought. [Euripides-The Phoenician Women (c.411-409 B.C.)] http://www.macedonia.info/FALLACIESANDFACTS.htm Sic semper tyrannis.

anonemus

...also, another cheesy-sounding suggestion, have you watched this movie?


Hitch (film) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

skylineaddict

Yeah, basically there are a million variables in me having a chance with that girl. Only 3 or 4 favor me. I would wait for next year, but I can't. It's hard to explain.

Oh, and I've watched Hitch. It's optimistic to the point of fiction. I quote Emerson: "If I have lost confidence in myself, I have the universe against me."

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Couldn't come up with anything snappy to say, so I'll just be awkward.

crowTrobot

You don't have to be a total ass. Interact in groups, how often do you take control of conversations? have interesting funny anecdotes, etc. There are ways to be noticed that doesn't involve wearing an Ed Hardy shirt and a barbwire/chinese symbol tattoo.

Also, you might be missing visual/verbal queues that the girl is giving out, if she's interested, when to push forward, when to give space, etc. Unfortunately these are all learned from experience so you really have no choice but to interact with women and learn. Women aren't looking forward to the prospect of being alone with a guy they don't know no matter what they look (it doesn't help if you look like Marty Feldman of course), they don't care if you are a gentleman or humble, if they don't know you and don't talk to you, you are just a creepy guy to them so getting them comfortable in your prescence is important. That's why interacting within a group is always a good opening to meeting women and from there pulling them away to make your intentions clear rather than approaching them one by one.

Also meet and talk to women just for the sake of talking to them (you don't have to hit on them). You never know they might have hot friends. If they do, and their friend vouches for you already then you are in. It also builds your confidence and you learn from experience.

skylineaddict

Thanks for the help.. You kinda hit the mark with the whole creepy dude thing, so I need to change that about me.

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Couldn't come up with anything snappy to say, so I'll just be awkward.

anonemus

....

ling93

Hey I know am not exactly qualified for this, but i think before time runs out (valentines) you could have a practice date with one of your sisters/female friends and let them judge.........

By what your telling us I dont think your doing anything wrong maybe its something that your not doing at all............ I hope am making sense......

skylineaddict

I had a short walk with her after class today. I have never had such a smooth conversation with a girl I like.. So it may just be going well for me. She won't be on campus for Valentine's Day unfortunately..

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Couldn't come up with anything snappy to say, so I'll just be awkward.

Optix

If the talk went well then that is most of the battle. Conversation is the key to any relationship, whether it is in the fledgling states right up until marital bliss and beyond. If it flowed well and she contributed to it as well then I think you are heading in the right direction.

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Matth

YouTube - How to Meet Beautiful Women

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Mary had a little lamb,
Her father shot it dead
Now Mary takes her lamb to school,
Between two crusts of bread

iPlayer

I suspected I was doing it wrong!

skylineaddict

I love Benny Hill!

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Couldn't come up with anything snappy to say, so I'll just be awkward.

Senor_Mota

Look, man. I'm 6' 3", 240 lbs., VERY out of shape(I look like a reversed pear), a smoker, a cynic and a young, single father. Some people would call me "damaged goods". Funny thing is, I still get laid whenever I want and I can date any woman I want. I've had them all - big girls, skinny ones, tall ones, short ones, slutty ones, religious ones, dumb ones, smart ones, beautiful ones, confident ones, crazy ones(my ex-wife).

Do you want to know what the secret to getting any girl is?

1. Make them feel like you really care about what they're saying, even if you really don't. "Court" them, if you will. Take your time and listen - they'll give you the answers you need.

2. Make them feel welcome and wanted, even in everyday conversation. Women love to feel like the time your spending together is fruitful as well as fun - just don't lay it on too thick. Women don't want a creep. No matter what her demeanor or level of financial comfort may be, no price can be put on being attentive and sweet.

3. Brush your teeth, comb your hair, take a shower and for god's sakes, have some paper tissues and toilet paper in your bathroom. They are the two most important accoutrements of a bachelor's home.

4. If you get a date lined up, plan to do something you don't absolutely love, but that you know two people will enjoy. For example, bowling. Pay for dinner, split a taxi. If you drive, open the door for her when she gets in. Be a gentleman, not a tool.

5. Don't brag about yourself. EVER. Unless it's in good fun, or it's about your sexual prowess, girls don't want to hear it.

6. Eventually, you'll realize that all the preliminary crap that we put on love is meaningless, because she wouldn't go out with you if she didn't like you and after the first couple times of hanging out, you have your mind made up about how you feel about her. So...

7. BE A MAN! Be yourself! Be confident, funny, sharp, witty and handsome. Or at least think you are.

Positive thinking, cleanliness and a big smile works like a charm. Good luck!

sahara_mafia

nice does and don't
i'll try it out

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BlueMak

One more thing, when she says a story, do not interrupt her or follow with a better story, funnier joke, etc.

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The people who are regarded as moral luminaries are those who forego ordinary pleasures themselves and find compensation in interfering with the pleasures of others(Bertrand Russell)"You go into Afghanistan, you got guys who slap women around for five years because they didn't wear a veil,You know, guys like that ain't got no manhood left anyway. So it's a hell of a lot of fun to shoot them." - Lt. Gen. James N. Mattis
This is slavery, not to speak one's thought. [Euripides-The Phoenician Women (c.411-409 B.C.)] http://www.macedonia.info/FALLACIESANDFACTS.htm Sic semper tyrannis.

skylineaddict

Well, I'm going to grab coffee with her on Friday. I'll try and keep the rules in ma head.

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Couldn't come up with anything snappy to say, so I'll just be awkward.