theironman

A month ago I discovered that the girl I wanted has a boyfriend. So I tried to forget her and invited two girls from college, that I think are very cool, to a date and they refused. After that I invited an old and ugly friend of mine to have some ice cream and once again the answer was no. Even my cousins refused to go out with me ... What's the problem with me ? Even flowers I bought to ask them to go out . I just wanna a girlfriend. It is so difficult!! What do i do?

BlueMak

How old are you?

The moment women sense the odor of desperation on a man, they run away faster you can see them. Stop groveling and stop asking women to be your girlfriends. Before I go into more, how old are you?

Oh, btw, asking your cousin out, smells like either some bad wiring up there or something far worse, a troll.

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The people who are regarded as moral luminaries are those who forego ordinary pleasures themselves and find compensation in interfering with the pleasures of others(Bertrand Russell)"You go into Afghanistan, you got guys who slap women around for five years because they didn't wear a veil,You know, guys like that ain't got no manhood left anyway. So it's a hell of a lot of fun to shoot them." - Lt. Gen. James N. Mattis
This is slavery, not to speak one's thought. [Euripides-The Phoenician Women (c.411-409 B.C.)] http://www.macedonia.info/FALLACIESANDFACTS.htm Sic semper tyrannis.

theironman

I am 23 years old and I asked my cousins to go out with me because I wanted to talk with someone. i did not have any interest on them. I just wanted to have someone to talk, to do something funny together, but even them said I am boring. I suppose my conversation is not pleasant or I am not good looking.

theironman

I do not know. I suppose the problem is on me.

Veridian3

Its sad to say but I would guess that nowadays younger women would probably find being given flowers before a relationship strange. Its more something you give to someone you are with... or at a push when you meet up for the first "official" date. (That may vary from woman to woman though)

The best advice is probably to find out a few key things about the girls you like. From that find something you can do together and make sure you are reasonably knowledgeable about it. Gives you a basis to start from 1) Something they are keen on. 2) You can keep a conversation going about it.

Could make a big difference.

Mousey

Learn how to read body language, Gives you a better understanding of when to press your luck and when to leave it... Quite helpful if you like having your testicles remaining unflattened

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BlueMak

Unless you are attractive, rich, famous, musician, it's generally not the best thing to approach a woman and out of the blue ask her to be your girlfriend. Also, from what I understand, they don't expect you to ask them to become your girlfriend. They think of it so very 1940s. Not in a good way.
You must spend time with them (if they want to), and if there is an attraction from them too,then go for something like an extra smile (Not Joker like), a touch on the hand or even a kiss, but all of them are risky depending on the society you live. You risk getting slapped, kicked, have your head cut, or at the more ruthless societies, getting sued for sexual harassment. Or if it works, you get a girl.

Be nice, but don't be a slave. Don't stalk. Don't push for a date. Never use the word date or girlfriend/boyfriend when asking someone out. Ask her for a drink or whatever it is usually done over there.

Make sure you are clean and you take a shower (or I guess bath) every day, that you wear clean clothes (and shoes), that you take care of your mouth hygiene.
If you have any skin condition or anything that can be taken care of which might reduce how good you look to her, take care of it as much as possible.
If you are fat, lose weight, if you are too skinny, put on some weight.

You know how they say that you need to be yourself etc etc? It's all bullshit. You can do that only if you already are over certain level of attractiveness according to the society you live in at the time. If you are bellow that, say hello to hookersville.
Or find someone who is also not a top catch and hope she is desperate enough to have a relationship based on loneliness and desperation.


There are two things which make most of the negative things about "you" go away when dealing with women. 1)Confidence. Women love confidence and can sense any fake one and any desperate guy. Fix it. 2)Money. If you are rich, you will always find available women to spend time with you and even love you. Just make sure you don't lose your riches.

Yes, life is hard, but if you give up at the age of 23, you might as well admit that the girls have a good reason for not wanting to be with a loser and someone who gives up so soon in his life.

__________________

The people who are regarded as moral luminaries are those who forego ordinary pleasures themselves and find compensation in interfering with the pleasures of others(Bertrand Russell)"You go into Afghanistan, you got guys who slap women around for five years because they didn't wear a veil,You know, guys like that ain't got no manhood left anyway. So it's a hell of a lot of fun to shoot them." - Lt. Gen. James N. Mattis
This is slavery, not to speak one's thought. [Euripides-The Phoenician Women (c.411-409 B.C.)] http://www.macedonia.info/FALLACIESANDFACTS.htm Sic semper tyrannis.

theironman

" You know how they say that you need to be yourself etc etc? It's all bullshit. "

This is the biggest truth in the whole world

theironman

I am not rich, I am not handsome and I am not too intelligent.

So I am in a big trouble dude

Liqourice

My best advise is. Don't care.. ignore women completely. Just enjoy yourself, have fun and do whatever you feel like doing. In a sense, make yourself feel good about yourself and who you are. Eventually she will drop on your lap.

Women don't want what they can have. They want what they can't have...

BlueMak

Well, at least you can change one of the three.

__________________

The people who are regarded as moral luminaries are those who forego ordinary pleasures themselves and find compensation in interfering with the pleasures of others(Bertrand Russell)"You go into Afghanistan, you got guys who slap women around for five years because they didn't wear a veil,You know, guys like that ain't got no manhood left anyway. So it's a hell of a lot of fun to shoot them." - Lt. Gen. James N. Mattis
This is slavery, not to speak one's thought. [Euripides-The Phoenician Women (c.411-409 B.C.)] http://www.macedonia.info/FALLACIESANDFACTS.htm Sic semper tyrannis.

theironman

lol

I am not rich = I have to win in the lottery
I am not handsome = surgery
I am not too intelligent = surgery to have another brain

Thanks for your advice dude, but as you said reality is quite different. I suppose I have to find someone in despair too, because real lif is very different. But your advice were great , they were true. Thank you.

IvanV

You need a little (lot) more confidence, more than anything else. And that's inside you.

As far as looks are concerned, unless you have horns, you're fine. If you feel like you need to get in better shape, do it, but other than that, trust me, you're fine. Girls do however appreciate a guy who takes care of his appearance. No need to go overboard with that (girls don't like that either), just look clean, tidy and take a little care of how you dress.

And number three, learn to talk to them. The best advice there is that practice makes perfect and it's something you can practice with more or less any girl you meet. Find a topic you have in common or just get her talking about herself. If you see something you really like on the girl, don't be afraid to tell her that. Also, if you see that she is uncomfortable about something about herself, don't be afraid to tease her a little about it. And don't be afraid that you'll bore them, it doesn't matter if you do, because, like I said, it's something one has to practice.

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If anyone has Portal 2 and hasn't played the co-op and wants to do me a favour, let me know (PM me or whatever).

BiGBrOwNPimpsta

Just stay home and fap your worries away. When in doubt, just go get an escort and BANG THAT BITCH RETARDED. Call me for hookups

Edit - asking for female advice on a computer forum is like asking for car advice in a grocery store my friend. Read the book "The Game" by Neil Straus and read up on PUA topics. Not to become a PUA, but to change your thinking.

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Sound Blaster X-Fi Xtreme Music | Logitech Z-5500 THX 5.1 Surround Sound Speakers | 2 Lite-On 20x S-ATA Burners | Logitech G700 Mouse | Logitech MX5500 Bluetooth Keyboard

Judas

lol...

I was going to say..... the rule of thumb that "was" well known around here was that what you don't have in your head... you put into your back.....

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Neshi

that's a bit harsh.. not everyone on a computer forum is socially retarded and has no love life.
There is some great advice on here, but just reading your posts the one thing you're lacking is confidence and self esteem. If you don't like the way you look, do something about it. You can't change your face, but you can definately change your appearance. Get some exercise, go to the gym.. feel good about yourself, that is the first step.

Confidence.. talk to girls. If you are akward around girls.. not knowing what to say, when to say what and you are not working on that, it will never change. Practice makes perfect...

Live your life, don't go looking for girls. It's not a quest.
Besides, if you are looking you won't find it (usually). Living your life is the best advice I can give you to finding a girl. The only thing I need to add is, be part of social interaction. Go out to town, join a club of some sorts (where there are girls) etc. You catch my drift.
If you don't see girls/guys on a regular basis, ie have no social interaction in life, you will never find someone.

hope this helps.

The attitude of: I'm ugly, i will never find someone and die a lonely death, will radiate from you, girls will pick up on that and it becomes fact.
however, when you feel good about yourself, about your life and are confident to talk... it's a whole different story.

__________________
If one does not attach himself to people and desire, never shall his heart be broken. But then, does he ever truly live?

Life is just too damn short for if's and maybe's

skylineaddict

I am not an attractive guy, nor am I rich. The only things I have going for me are my artistic talents and my intelligence. So, here's my advice. How seriously you take it is up to you because I've never had a girlfriend, but that just means I know a lot about what doesn't work. What I've tried:

-Flaunting my talents
-Working out and getting fit
-Being confident around girls
-Making friends with lots of girls and talking to them
-Meeting girls at parties
-Cheesy pickup lines
-And many more

These are usually things that will work, minus the cheesy pickup lines of course. But there is one factor that has been repeated over and over again. DON'T BE DESPERATE!

The one time that I least expected to meet a girl, I met her (Unfortunately the timing was bad because it was the night before I went out of the country for a month so it ended up not working out). It was at my apartment. I was having a party there, and I was just having fun, not caring about girls at all. When I met her, there was an instant connection. I know this because she didn't leave my side until she actually had to leave.

So, what I did right there was not care about getting a girl. I was just caring about having fun and living life. So, just live your life and don't care about girls.

One more crucial piece of advice. If you think that there's something in you that needs to be fixed, something that isn't right, don't even think about looking for a girl. A girl will be able to tell if you feel that way and it's a red flag to them.

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Couldn't come up with anything snappy to say, so I'll just be awkward.

BiGBrOwNPimpsta

Some transformation is needed, but it is the thought pattern first to change which is a lot of work. You want to avoid being douchebag club guido to be a "ladies man". That's not real game. Read up on girl psyche and people psyche. If you care about every little detail like OCing your machine, get nowhere. You must be able to sell yourself and not forcefully. And I'm not harsh making the point, I'm straight up because it's not the right resource. I say this and I'm a computer guy.

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Neshi

I just think that PUA and 'the game' is great and all, if ONS's is all your after.. If you are after a girlfriend, thus a real relationship, than that is not the way to go.
You're true self will bubble up, sooner or later, and that will not be the PUA-person.
Of course its great to build up some confidence in a real short time, but there are other means to do that.. which have already been mentioned.

__________________
If one does not attach himself to people and desire, never shall his heart be broken. But then, does he ever truly live?

Life is just too damn short for if's and maybe's

BiGBrOwNPimpsta

That is the biggest misconception, it's how you deal with people and specifically women short AND long term. You haven't read or seen the material, it's really knowing how to break the ice and keep it going.

__________________
Sound Blaster X-Fi Xtreme Music | Logitech Z-5500 THX 5.1 Surround Sound Speakers | 2 Lite-On 20x S-ATA Burners | Logitech G700 Mouse | Logitech MX5500 Bluetooth Keyboard

BlueMak

If you never have a relationship and then dive in a serious one as your first one, I don't see it working for too long. You need practice, it's not easy being with one in a steady relationship. Don't go in thinking "this is my future wife". You will fuck it up.

__________________

The people who are regarded as moral luminaries are those who forego ordinary pleasures themselves and find compensation in interfering with the pleasures of others(Bertrand Russell)"You go into Afghanistan, you got guys who slap women around for five years because they didn't wear a veil,You know, guys like that ain't got no manhood left anyway. So it's a hell of a lot of fun to shoot them." - Lt. Gen. James N. Mattis
This is slavery, not to speak one's thought. [Euripides-The Phoenician Women (c.411-409 B.C.)] http://www.macedonia.info/FALLACIESANDFACTS.htm Sic semper tyrannis.