SexPistoL

Here is a chance to get some bad taste jokes off your chest..............I'll start:

Two female suicide bombers were out shopping for "rucksacks" One of them puts her new sack on her back then looks down at herself, then looks at the other the female and say's;

"Does my bomb look big in this"

__________________

niceguyrichy

[color=black]1)The spark had been lost in this guy's marriage, so he was trying to think of a way to rekindle it.[/color]

[color=black]One night he came from work, and found his wife asleep in bed.[/color]

[color=black]He thought to himself, "What should I do?" [/color]

[color=black]He proceeded to get under the covers and go down on his wife. Soon she began to gently squirm and moan in pleasure.[/color]

[color=black]After a few minutes, her body spasmed with ecstasy as she climaxed.[/color]

[color=black]Afterwards, the man went straight to the bathroom to brush his teeth.[/color]

[color=black]When he got there, the light was on and he saw his wife there shaving her legs.[/color]

[color=black]He exclaimed, "What are you doing in here?"[/color]

[color=black]She said, "Shhhh!" pointing at the bed, "You'll wake your mother."[/color]


[color=black]This one's not particularly bad taste, but I like it:[/color]

[color=black]2)The judge says to a double-homicide defendant, "You're charged with beating your wife to death with a hammer." [/color]

[color=black]A voice at the back of the courtroom yells out, "You bastard!" [/color]

[color=black]The judge says, "You're also charged with beating your mother-in-law to death with a hammer." [/color]

[color=black]The voice in the back of the courtroom yells out, "You bastard!" [/color]

[color=black]The judge stops and says to the guy in the back of the courtroom, "Sir, I can understand your anger and frustration at this crime. But no more outbursts from you, or I'll charge you with contempt. Is that understood?" [/color]

[color=black]The guy in the back of the court stands up and says, "I'm sorry, Your Honor, but for fifteen years, I've lived next door to that bastard, and every time I asked to borrow a hammer, he said he didn't have one."[/color]

__________________

SexPistoL

__________________

SexPistoL

Hey Richy,

Imagine that............but what a dilema, the "Q" is..........Would you tell your Wife or not ? Or would it be worse if you didn't and your Wife found out by accident !

__________________

niceguyrichy

I dunno.

I mean, is there a right time to tell your wife that you went down on your own mother???

__________________

Xx#1BallerxX

oooookaaayyyyy.

__________________

niceguyrichy

Well is there???

__________________

SexPistoL

M8 Ive gotta stop this before it scar's me...........hehe

__________________

niceguyrichy

Guess that's a no.
Oh well, just a quick one:

1) I was asked to run a marathon and I said no chance.

Then I was told it was for spastic and blind kids and I thought
'Fuck it I could win that!'

__________________

riles9262

that hammer one was awesome

quickie: how do you know when it's bedtime at michael jackson's house?


when the big hand touches the little hand.

__________________
A beer a day keeps the doctor away.

SexPistoL

I heard you came 5th M8

__________________

SexPistoL

M8 he was proved inocent................My arse !

__________________

SexPistoL

A coach load of spastics smashed into a wall. It took 2hrs to get the "coach away from the wreckage"

__________________

niceguyrichy

triple post

__________________

SexPistoL

Sorry

__________________

SexPistoL

"News Flash".......

Two gay muslim extremist terrorist exploded today.....................Police believe they were "SUICIDE BUMMERS"

__________________

AttroPheed

i need a uk english to us english translator.

__________________

"Facts seldom interfere with belief." - James Randi
"Where knowledge ends, superstition begins." - Some Guy
"A wise man proportions his belief to the evidence." - David Hume
[COLOR=red]Flying Spaghetti Is Lord!![/COLOR]

My PC Stats

niceguyrichy

Well if you guys hadn't taken our language and bastardised it in the way that you did in the first place you'd understand perfectly that a "bummer" is a gay person, and so 'to be bummed' means to be shagged in the ass by a man.
Which is gay.
Being shagged in the ass by a woman is just fun.

__________________

SexPistoL

Only for some richy

__________________

Xen Withanex

What's the difference between Londoners and Smarties?

Smarties don't melt in the tube...

(THAT'S bad taste)

patje

talking about spastic kids, I saw one playing on the ground the other day... and it fell off

__________________

SFOSOK

We only made the English language more understandable.

__________________
*Warning* - Explicit Content Preceeding



METAL!!

SexPistoL

Yea right!.............that's why you play "football" with your hands, as well !

__________________

Rayder

What's the difference between an Arab and a Hindu?












An Arab is rope-start.

A Hindu is push-button.

SexPistoL

Call me Mr thicky............but I dont get it

__________________

SexPistoL

3 blokes, English man, Irish man and a Scottsman, were running away from a Pirate. They decided to get on a ship to leave the island. At the keyside were three old sacks on the floor. They all jumped in a sack each hopeing to get loaded onto the ship, without getting spotted by the pirate.

Just as they were about to be loaded, the pirate walked upto the first sack with the English man in and kicked it. The English man went........Woof Woof, the pirate thought oh little puppies and left it alone. He then went upto the sack with the Scotsman and kicked it........A Meeeeeeeeeeeoooooowwwwwww, came from within the sack. The pirate thought, oh little kitty cats and left it.

The pirate then kicked the last sack and the Irish man said "Potatoes !"

__________________

Ferret_Style

lol that last one was BAD!

__________________


"You might be Eaten by a Grue" MC Frontalot!

SexPistoL

It don't get no better either M8..........

__________________

Partizan

My english kinda sucks but anyway:

A mother was dragging her kid by his leg down the stairs in a skyscraper so his head was banging on the stairs.

A neighbour comes up the stairs and says: "Watch out, he is gonna lose his skullcap!"

The mother replies: "Don't you worry, I nailed it down with some nails and a hammer."

__________________

Partizan

Q: What is worse than an infant in a trashcan?

A: An infant in two trashcans.

__________________