HL2: The lost Coaster

MSX · Oct 28, 2005, 07:47 AM

I got a warning that said my processor was 0.4 ghz off of recommended. Guess the folks over at valve have been unaware that the MHz myth has been busted for the past few years.

The first thing the game did was crash. Then, after restarting windows, I got back in and had no problems.

Though after that little upset I thought I'd showcase various 'features' of the lost coaster. So come with me on a magical journey:

The beach is really shiny. Too bad the water is blocky.

My god there’s floating speech bubbles with ellipses in them. What are we playing Quake3?

Psst there’s some ammo hidden near the ship. Nothing really important as you’re already armed to the teeth anyway.

At this point I noticed that the ship did not cast any shadows. Peculiar. Then I noticed the (apparently Chineese)fisherman did not cast a shadow on the dock. I'd assume he's a vampire or something as I unloaded all my explosives on him and he shrugged them off. As for the ship: Ship Vampire?

Then he was badly reading my mind trying to divine my name. Get away from me you freaky bastard!

Moving on, or up. After that damned fisherman opens the stupid invulnerable gate for me I was off. Climbing up the cliff. Look! Combine! The evil fisherman must not like combine blood, so I splattered it all over the cliffside. Take that you demonic fisherman!

Though then out of some strange coincidence I developed my own mind powers. Freeze combine!

After killing a few I got bored and walked up to the little bit of town on the hill. Then I decided to lock myself in a church. I dunno it just seemed like a good idea at the time.

I tried to have a nap on the alter but the fact that the pastor was obviously some sort of gun touting psycho who left all his ammo strewn about the alter. I like him already! Though I felt uncomfortable sleeping around RPG's without a proper exit. So I solved both problems and unloaded my ammo on the wooden door. Not a dent. Damn.

After lying down for a few minutes I heard this pounding. I thought I was getting a migraine, but I looked around and found some sort of poundy device. A combine poundy device! In a church? I saw a sign. It said 'something: crush your hand in here'. Ok. So, I pulled off the cover and to my dismay I could not get it crushed.

I bumped another panel and warning buzzers on the crushy machine broke. I guess the poundy device had something to do with the smoking town in the distance... Then some spider bit me. Like out of nowhere! Ow! See if you like some RPG!

Uh oh more combine! I know because they keep talking to themselves. They should take a cue from me and cut out their tongues so they cant say anything at all... What a chopper too? I still have nightmares about invulnerable choppers... Though this one was a five RPG wonder. Lucky me.

Then I suddenly got the urge for a little type rope walking. Jump, jump summersault! Look a basket! Just like when I used to wash the windows at black Mesa. It really takes me back...

What? The Vampire fisherman was not repelled by the buckets and buckets of combine blood?!! I guess my motivation for brutally killing them all with my crowbar was wrong.

Then he stated something about freaky fetish... celebrating with leaches or something. And I thought: I'm outta here! So I teleported away from that infernal bastard! There’s no way I'm participating in some sort of freaky blood sucking orgy. I mean I just met him. You have to get to know a demonic creature of evil before that kind of thing... Well, back to cryo freeze.

They took a year to make a demo that I beat in ten minutes on hard... Yes, the lost coaster took more time to download than to play. Yes, farcry still has better water, but now HL2 has a cool little light dimming feature. Hopefully it will be used.

Dyre Straits · Oct 28, 2005, 08:13 AM

When I first read the title to this thread, I thought you were missing the little thingy to put your cup on on your desk.

MSX · Oct 28, 2005, 08:38 AM

Yeah Gabe found it under his desk and uploaded it to steam.

Dyre Straits · Oct 28, 2005, 09:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MSX

Yeah Gabe found it under his desk and uploaded it to steam.

Sorry, I just couldn't pass that up.

Anyway, I've got the game and started it up. Looks VERY Sweet!!!

Rasta Monsta · Oct 29, 2005, 10:54 PM

That shit is hilarious, dude. You should take that show on the road!

rasta

SFOSOK · Oct 30, 2005, 01:17 AM

Yeah. After playing it through with commentary (to try and make it longer) I realized this is just a showcase that I could have watched by playing DOD:S

Its cool and all to get insight into how they do those sort of things but why did it take so long?

Mazuko · Oct 30, 2005, 02:24 PM

They were working on DOD:S that's why

***craig5320*** · Oct 30, 2005, 03:34 PM

Well it took me the best part of half an hour, but i beat those electric eels

[color=#232d35]

[/color]

Nothing over there, pretty poo, but made it longer, I didn't fly or any other way of cheating to do this, everyone's probably already done it anyway but...

Sandok · Oct 30, 2005, 08:43 PM

One word... Ew.

>GSXR<mrbusa · Oct 30, 2005, 09:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by craig5320

Well it took me the best part of half an hour, but i beat those electric eels

[color=#232d35]

[/color]

Nothing over there, pretty poo, but made it longer, I didn't fly or any other way of cheating to do this, everyone's probably already done it anyway but...

i accidently fell off the stairs and went in the water and made it over there on the first try.nothing is finished, it is like going out of bounds on an old ps1 game or something.maybe my pc just sucks but i dont see what the hoopla is about this whatever they call it new lighting bullcrap.

Pluvious · Oct 30, 2005, 09:11 PM

The only reason it took so long was so they could 'try' to steal some thunder from FEAR and QUAKE4. You can't tell me this 15 min demo took 6 months to create.

The Lost Coaster.. that's got to be the most funny and clever line.. LMAO. Great "review".

SFOSOK · Oct 30, 2005, 09:21 PM

I was trying to get lost in it to spread out my time but its not possible. Even exploring all the ledges that your not supposed to be on. I think like 4 people made this. They probably would have done better if they hired a mod team to help with the brute force of it like creating the map and such. I think Valve is still too proud to admit they make mistakes... A lot of mistakes...

***craig5320*** · Oct 31, 2005, 02:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by >GSXR<mrbusa

i accidently fell off the stairs and went in the water and made it over there on the first try.nothing is finished, it is like going out of bounds on an old ps1 game or something.maybe my pc just sucks but i dont see what the hoopla is about this whatever they call it new lighting bullcrap.

cool, I sailed across in the only boat that isn't damaged, while using the broken ones to drift into me knocking me along lol.

Oct 28, 2005, 07:47 AM	#1
MSX Burning the frozen... Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 1,201 Rep Power: 0	HL2: The lost Coaster I got a warning that said my processor was 0.4 ghz off of recommended. Guess the folks over at valve have been unaware that the MHz myth has been busted for the past few years. The first thing the game did was crash. Then, after restarting windows, I got back in and had no problems. Though after that little upset I thought I'd showcase various 'features' of the lost coaster. So come with me on a magical journey: The beach is really shiny. Too bad the water is blocky. My god there’s floating speech bubbles with ellipses in them. What are we playing Quake3? Psst there’s some ammo hidden near the ship. Nothing really important as you’re already armed to the teeth anyway. At this point I noticed that the ship did not cast any shadows. Peculiar. Then I noticed the (apparently Chineese)fisherman did not cast a shadow on the dock. I'd assume he's a vampire or something as I unloaded all my explosives on him and he shrugged them off. As for the ship: Ship Vampire? Then he was badly reading my mind trying to divine my name. Get away from me you freaky bastard! Moving on, or up. After that damned fisherman opens the stupid invulnerable gate for me I was off. Climbing up the cliff. Look! Combine! The evil fisherman must not like combine blood, so I splattered it all over the cliffside. Take that you demonic fisherman! Though then out of some strange coincidence I developed my own mind powers. Freeze combine! After killing a few I got bored and walked up to the little bit of town on the hill. Then I decided to lock myself in a church. I dunno it just seemed like a good idea at the time. I tried to have a nap on the alter but the fact that the pastor was obviously some sort of gun touting psycho who left all his ammo strewn about the alter. I like him already! Though I felt uncomfortable sleeping around RPG's without a proper exit. So I solved both problems and unloaded my ammo on the wooden door. Not a dent. Damn. After lying down for a few minutes I heard this pounding. I thought I was getting a migraine, but I looked around and found some sort of poundy device. A combine poundy device! In a church? I saw a sign. It said 'something: crush your hand in here'. Ok. So, I pulled off the cover and to my dismay I could not get it crushed. I bumped another panel and warning buzzers on the crushy machine broke. I guess the poundy device had something to do with the smoking town in the distance... Then some spider bit me. Like out of nowhere! Ow! See if you like some RPG! Uh oh more combine! I know because they keep talking to themselves. They should take a cue from me and cut out their tongues so they cant say anything at all... What a chopper too? I still have nightmares about invulnerable choppers... Though this one was a five RPG wonder. Lucky me. Then I suddenly got the urge for a little type rope walking. Jump, jump summersault! Look a basket! Just like when I used to wash the windows at black Mesa. It really takes me back... What? The Vampire fisherman was not repelled by the buckets and buckets of combine blood?!! I guess my motivation for brutally killing them all with my crowbar was wrong. Then he stated something about freaky fetish... celebrating with leaches or something. And I thought: I'm outta here! So I teleported away from that infernal bastard! There’s no way I'm participating in some sort of freaky blood sucking orgy. I mean I just met him. You have to get to know a demonic creature of evil before that kind of thing... Well, back to cryo freeze. They took a year to make a demo that I beat in ten minutes on hard... Yes, the lost coaster took more time to download than to play. Yes, farcry still has better water, but now HL2 has a cool little light dimming feature. Hopefully it will be used.

Oct 30, 2005, 01:17 AM	#6
SFOSOK 939 Goin Strong Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Ontario Posts: 7,033 Rep Power: 89 System Specs	Yeah. After playing it through with commentary (to try and make it longer) I realized this is just a showcase that I could have watched by playing DOD:S Its cool and all to get insight into how they do those sort of things but why did it take so long? __________________ Warning - Explicit Content Preceeding METAL!!

Oct 30, 2005, 02:24 PM	#7
Mazuko DriverHeaven Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Fredericksburg, VA Posts: 1,008 Rep Power: 0 System Specs	They were working on DOD:S that's why __________________ E-bay feedback: http://feedback.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAP...me=STRK:ME:UFS

Oct 30, 2005, 03:34 PM	#8
*craig5320* HH Administrator Join Date: May 2002 Location: Manchester, UK Posts: 8,282 Rep Power: 428 System Specs	Well it took me the best part of half an hour, but i beat those electric eels [color=#232d35][/color] Nothing over there, pretty poo, but made it longer, I didn't fly or any other way of cheating to do this, everyone's probably already done it anyway but... __________________

Oct 30, 2005, 09:11 PM	#11
Pluvious Elisha = hottie Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: USA CA. SF Bay Area Posts: 1,318 Rep Power: 56	The only reason it took so long was so they could 'try' to steal some thunder from FEAR and QUAKE4. You can't tell me this 15 min demo took 6 months to create. The Lost Coaster.. that's got to be the most funny and clever line.. LMAO. Great "review". __________________

Oct 28, 2005, 08:38 AM	Thread Starter #3
MSX Burning the frozen... Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 1,201 Rep Power: 0	Yeah Gabe found it under his desk and uploaded it to steam.

Oct 30, 2005, 08:43 PM	#9
Sandok DriverHeaven Extreme Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 9,472 Rep Power: 66	One word... Ew.

Oct 30, 2005, 09:21 PM	#12
SFOSOK 939 Goin Strong Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Ontario Posts: 7,033 Rep Power: 89 System Specs	I was trying to get lost in it to spread out my time but its not possible. Even exploring all the ledges that your not supposed to be on. I think like 4 people made this. They probably would have done better if they hired a mod team to help with the brute force of it like creating the map and such. I think Valve is still too proud to admit they make mistakes... A lot of mistakes... __________________ Warning - Explicit Content Preceeding METAL!!