[Mousey]

Note - this is copied and edited from one of my chat logs so it might not make 100% sense.

Originally Posted by My Situation

:makes me chuckle how badly fucked i am, I thought i was getting over april and i'm right back to square bloody 1. if this is how fucked i am then maybe i should just live with it perhaps? i eitheir get like flashes of her in my dreams or it's all about her and it kinda freaks me out. like sometimes i'll just see myself with her, talking, holding hands or w/e and sometimes there'll be a full bloody story behind it. And when you think about it, april ties one hell of a lot of things together for me. There's rhys and i started talking to rhys about april and i added you in a conversation or w/e.

PK as well, i think i started doing that to try forget about april and yes, it works sometimes but the thing is, i don't want to forget about her i just see it as disrespectful that's all. I mean you could probably stick a knife in rhys and walk away humming because you don't forgive what he's done, i can't walk away from april because i understand the things she's done to me and i understand why she did, and i'm pretty sure that april understands as well. i mean we're almost like a couple, we have ups and downs and i like it in a wierd sort of way. I think it was after the thing with science, she smiled at me while i was outside the deputy head's office because i forgot my planner and that made my entire day, i just couldn't stop smiling, she was only there getting the register with her friend rachel though. and when she smiled at me getting off the bus, it was like a scene out of every bad romance you've ever watched. Whenever i think of her smiling that's what i see. And all that seems incredibly ironic considering the song i was listening to. (I don't love you - my chemical romance)
My problem is i'm too much of a logical thinker, i factor risks into nearly every decision i make which yeah sure, is a good thing but every time i think about telling her what i feel like there's just too many risks; for starters i can never catch her on her own and it all builds up to her taking it the wrong way and never even being able to look at me anymore i'm 100% sincere when i say i'm petrified of the outcome, despite how scared i am of the outcome i can't help but feel she's just playing me around, the occasional look i keep thinking i catch or the odd smile i recieve which just lifts me up it's screwing with my head so badly, and in some twisted way i love her mind games.

My situation really fucks me up, but I love it.

Edit - i posted this in general chat not FWZ or echoes because i really can't be arsed with insensitive comments right now, say what you like but please don't start flaming..

[IvanV]

I sympathize with you because I had someone about whom I was having dreams (nightmares sometimes), someone I couldn't get out of my head.

Now, I didn't understand the entire situation, but if I got anything right, you are in love with a friend and are afraid to tell her that? I've been there a couple of times, and though I cannot guarantee you anything, not telling cost me one of those friends, and telling, despite a rather unpleasant conversation we've had on the occasion, probably saved the other.

[Mousey]

Originally Posted by IvanV

I sympathize with you because I had someone about whom I was having dreams (nightmares sometimes), someone I couldn't get out of my head.

Now, I didn't understand the entire situation, but if I got anything right, you are in love with a friend and are afraid to tell her that? I've been there a couple of times, and though I cannot guarantee you anything, not telling cost me one of those friends, and telling, despite a rather unpleasant conversation we've had on the occasion, probably saved the other.

That's pretty much it in a nutshell.
If you dig deep enough round these forums i'm sure you'll find threads i've posted about this girl before, she's called April btw.
And yeah i know a fair bit of the post doesn't make sense but it's made up of lots of sentences i took from an msn conversation with a close friend that's away atm so i couldnt' say it to her face (btw she isn't april ) like i would generally do.

Rhys is her ex-boyfriend who basically neglected her until she snapped and left him.

[IvanV]

Very much like the situation I was in. I met that girl some months ago. I was feeling down one evening and she saw that and started a conversation to make me feel better. Over time, we became good friends and I found out about her last boyfriend who'd really hurt her and that she'd been single ever since the breakup. Anyway, recently, I started to feel affection for her that wasn't entirely friendly and I wasn't sure what to do. And then, somehow the topic popped-out, I really don't know who started it. And it was quite awkward, but it turned out ok. She didn't take it the wrong way, and I found out exactly how she feels about me, and we were able to carry on. So I advice you to be open about it, especially since this is serious and you need to know where you stand. No matter how it plays out, there will be a huge burden taken off of your shoulders (and I believe, considering how true and strong your emotions are, that April, in the least, won't be offended).

[Falstaff]

I think we should contact our resident psychologist, OMEGARED to comment on this story.

[BlueMak]

Stop being such a pussy. Either do something now to get together (works or not), or get over her.
You spend too much time thinking and worrying about her feelings and your feelings and my dead dog's feelings.
You are the only one losing from this situation. You are the loser, the one that can't get on with your life. Show some self respect and be a man. Don't be a metropussy or whatever they are called. Don't be a muppet emo either.
Yes love hurts, yes rejection hurts, yes yes yes. Another 6 billion people have the same feelings, they get on with them, you should too.

[Mousey]

Originally Posted by BlueMak

Stop being such a pussy. Either do something now to get together (works or not), or get over her.
You spend too much time thinking and worrying about her feelings and your feelings and my dead dog's feelings.
You are the only one losing from this situation. You are the loser, the one that can't get on with your life. Show some self respect and be a man. Don't be a metropussy or whatever they are called. Don't be a muppet emo either.
Yes love hurts, yes rejection hurts, yes yes yes. Another 6 billion people have the same feelings, they get on with them, you should too.

I got to a point a few weeks ago when i was determined to get this all out in the open like Ivan suggested and i was looking for an opportunity to catch her after a lesson and i pussied out just before my ideal opportunity popped up.

I know for a fact i'm never going to forgive myself if i let what could be such a beautiful opportunity slip from under me. I'm going to let my pk be a metaphor for this, I'm working on a vault atm called the Kong vault, i'm determined to perfect it by the end of the gym session i've got scheduled to day, then i'll do the same with April, i'll keep building until i just blurt it out.

[/ramble] I just got out of bed y'see

[Freulein]

Originally Posted by Falstaff

I think we should contact our resident psychologist, OMEGARED to comment on this story.

You made my day

[riles9262]

Dude, have a few drinks, and then reassess the situation You think too much; just act on whatever your gut instinct tells you is right.

[temeteus82]

Originally Posted by riles9262

Dude, have a few drinks, and then reassess the situation

Riles he is 15 yo. So it will be cola ....

[EDIT] Mousey: life is a roller coaster you newer know where it's taking you. Hang tight there.

[ferret2004]

Welcome to mixed up teenage emotions. Tell those glands to STFU

[Mousey]

Originally Posted by ferret2004

Welcome to mixed up teenage emotions. Tell those glands to STFU

Tried, Failed, Cried
I guess i'm going to have to face up to the whole situation, if you refer to my metaphor earlier you'll understand this bit; I am now doing perfect kongs. The gym was exactly what i needed, after a few attempts and a bit of encouragement from my mates i was doing kong after kong perfectly.

I'm really fucked now

[ferret2004]

Dating when you're young like that is more of a practice round than anything else. It's not sensible to seriously date because when young-uns graduate from high school (and ditch the high school mentality) and hit the real world, they change and usually become a new/different person.
~That my 2 cents, or whatever the heck it's worth these days

[Falstaff]

I can tell you Mousey, women are like fish, their are plenty in the sea.

[ferret2004]

Originally Posted by Falstaff

I can tell you Mousey, women are like fish, their are plenty in the sea.

Women and sushi have 1 thing in common: If it smells like fish, it isn't fresh