[isaak]

Tonight I was thinking about what I wanted when I grow up, and what I want to have, such as wealth, happiness etc.

My main obsession is having the latest and greatest technology. Of course this would require a LOT of money to achieve...and when I told my dad the first thin I was going to do with my car was put in a new speaker system he laughed and said I had no money. He's right...

Now my mum always tells me to just put in the hard yards during school to get me a good job which I like and makes me money. I agree with that but every time I tell myself that I am not going to sneak any in COD4 in term time, I find myself saying: "You're not actually gonna stand by this...you're gonna say this but you'll never follow through." So it got me thinking about my weaknesses at school which brought me to the conclusion that I have absolutely no focus at home for working. There are too many distractions. What can I do to bring this focus back at home so I can finish strongly at school?


So far I have thought about creating a "term-time" computer account, with no distractions (ie msn, facebook, possibly DH ), and all games are blocked (somehow).
Another option may be to get a few tutors so I HAVE to work outside of school...I'm thinking this is the best option.

Can anyone give me a hand

[BlueMak]

First of all, I don't know how old you are so I can't be certain what I say will apply to you.

I will give you an advice as someone who made the same mistakes.

Forget the PC. Get out and get laid or anything close to that. If you don't now, you will regret it later.



As for the PC, you can make an arrangement with yourself. Any gaming etc, should be used as a reward for studying. Set the X amount of hours you need to study per day. Divide that by 3. For every third part you complete, you are entitled to the same or double amount of time of gaming. BUT, you are not entitled to any gaming unless you finish with all 3 parts of studies for the day. There are no carry overs, no delays or excuses.
If you don't have enough time for both in one day, then reduce the amount of time you will play games. The amount of time for studies must remain the same.
If in one day you need more time to study, then you will make that time. If you study better, you will have more to gain in life (money, women, men, tech, whatever) than if you play more CoD4.
Every hour you spend studying is an hour investing in a better future for you, every hour spent on CoD4 gives you nothing in the long run.
There is no way you will reach 30,40, etc years old and say to yourself, DAMN i WISH I SPENT MORE TIME PLAYING CoD4 when I was younger.

Also, look at it this way, when you grow up, there is a better chance you will have a better paying job/income if you study more now, than if you don't. Which will not only bring the money, but could also bring the extra time if that is what you will be looking for then.

[Cow_160483]

Very good advice i could not have said it better BlueMark... this system of study and reward yourself for the work done has gotten me through my university studied and it has worked for me so give it a try Isaak it might work for you too.

[Veridian3]

Sounds like one of the things you really need to do is work out what exactly you want to do. Saying you want to make a load of money is giving you very little motivation to study hard and achieve a goal because that aim is too big. Unless you end up making millions at a young age you will never have "enough" money...

The fact that you are spending a lot of time on a PC rather than studying possibly gives you an idea of the marketplace you want to enter into... for example becoming a coder (if you have the patience) or maybe even a network administrator could be both interesting and rewarding.

Also, dont be too concerned with locking yourself into a set idea if you cant work out a specific role. I remember being told it the final 2 years of school that I needed to choose a University course then. I had no clue what I wanted to do so chose something which would be useful in a variety of ways and went to study that. By the time I was a year into university I had a better idea of what I wanted to do with my life and took decisions then to move towards that.

Some people have one set calling, some have a desire to achieve in the area they first work in and others have a need to move around for a fresh challenge. You will discover what type of person you are as time goes on... for now just make decisions that allow you flexibility...

I would however say that you should do what you can to get good grades because they will make things easier in the future. A lot of job roles or uni/college courses have minimum requirements and if you dont meet them you will first have to go a longer route to get in... e.g. passing a lower standard of course before you can be considered for the one you want.

Good luck and dont stress too much about this... there are plenty of years ahead for you to get to where you are happy.

[RE III - Frankie]

What you have to do is find the best subject you have and base all the other around that one. ...

[isaak]

I am in grade 11. So far in courses I am looking at something in the engineering field or maybe medical. My best subject would be engineering technology which involves designing and researching then implementing that design in the workshop.

In regards to focusing at home....I will tend to get home and switch on the computer, tell myself I will only check my emails and facebook then get straight off and get into work, but I never end up leaving the computer, instead I find some remotely useful information on what I am studying and just read that.

I just need something to keep me in a chair away from distractions and study and go over the days lessons. That is why I am thinking subject tutors would be the best option for me...I think I don't study at home because I don't fully understand something at school and therefore don't enjoy it. If I know how to do it, I will generally enjoy it.

thank you very much for all the replies

[Falstaff]

Without any superlatives and "back when I was your age" old guy talk.
your not going to have a direction unless you have a map and you have no direction without a compass, so think about the place you want to be and use your compass to draw your azimuth and follow that course.
but dont give up.
you might change directions now and then, get mired in emotional bullshit and even make a few mistakes.
Know yourself, find out what your strengths are, and that means a little personal inventory.
resolve to follow your dream no matter what, but be smart enough to know when to change gears, pool your resources.
above all else.
dont listen to psycho-babel well intentioned or otherwise unless you feel its worth listening to.
Lots of people will tell you who, what and how you should do something but keep to your guns.
if you can do just one thing well, you will have done more than a million people all trying to do too much all at once.
I like this old poem that I believe is called Desiderati

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even to the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs,
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love,
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life,
keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.
Do something that scares the crap out of you
enjoy what little peace there is in the world
Dance.

you might think all of this is EMO bullshit, or it might resonate, either way, I hope some of this sticks like well cooked spagetti to your mind or your soul.

cheers.

[isaak]

Thanks for all the replies... I am currently away and I will post a proper reply when I get back home. Maybe this holiday will be good for me

[RE III - Frankie]

Originally Posted by isaak

I am in grade 11. So far in courses I am looking at something in the engineering field or maybe medical. My best subject would be engineering technology which involves designing and researching then implementing that design in the workshop.

In regards to focusing at home....I will tend to get home and switch on the computer, tell myself I will only check my emails and facebook then get straight off and get into work, but I never end up leaving the computer, instead I find some remotely useful information on what I am studying and just read that.

I just need something to keep me in a chair away from distractions and study and go over the days lessons. That is why I am thinking subject tutors would be the best option for me...I think I don't study at home because I don't fully understand something at school and therefore don't enjoy it. If I know how to do it, I will generally enjoy it.

thank you very much for all the replies

My best advice to you about studying is this. My principal told me that he knew year 12 students that found loud fast music help them concentrate on studying. Also I fund that wanting to beat my personal best was always what got me through. Also having other's come around to help you can always be good fun when studying. I also found that I excelled in Maths because my friend and I were always competitive to who would finish their work first with the most accuracy. This method brought me to being in the Advanced mathematics class which for me was probably the best I could have acheived in my school. Does this help? Anyway keep your work in the back of your mind when you take a break too. Find distractions like females and when you come back to it you should feel a whole lot better! Good Luck mate. School is really shit!

[charm_quark]

@ falstaff, that was a nice poetry! very nice indead!

well back on topic

well, i have no idea what to tell you! most of the advice that guys are very good!, but the thing is not many of them know you personally!,

all i can say is be a man and stick to your decision,, but it is however very important to get good grades, it does not however mean that your life will end if you fail!, it just means that you will just spend a few more years to achieve the same thing. (same thing veridian said )

[Falstaff]

its just that self determination, empowerment, initiative and goal setting is all about choices...
for some folks that is pretty damn hard to do.
but even if you dont have a plan, or you dont make a choice...
you have still chosen..
at least that axium is true.

[charm_quark]

choice...... yes...... this is a probably a cliché , but its one decisions, that determines what one truly is !

[Robert McClelland]

You may need concerta riddling so you keep on your focus I have taked that when I do work if not I lose my mind.

[RE III - Frankie]

Originally Posted by Robert McClelland

You may need concerta riddling so you keep on your focus I have taked that when I do work if not I lose my mind.

Pills are shit. they just make you want to take illegal drugs. When I was in psychopathology all they would ask me is what drugs I had taken and how I remember feeling. I remember that at that time and coming off of drugs was the last thing I wanted to think about actually.

[Robert McClelland]

well they do help you stay focus though.

[GigaWatt]

get rid of the net on the PC in your room... a winner in my book, since i don't game...

[swimtech]

Originally Posted by Falstaff

its just that self determination, empowerment, initiative and goal setting is all about choices...
for some folks that is pretty damn hard to do.
but even if you dont have a plan, or you dont make a choice...
you have still chosen..
at least that axium is true.

I have to say I've never seen advice given both here and in the poem above that was so applicable, true, and practical. Veridian 3's advice has an outstanding perspective too - take it in.

It really is about choices. Choose to be self-disciplined, self controlled. After a certain point - no one is going to make you do what's good for you - they can't and shouldn't. From that foundation within yourself - being able to control your own choices - you can then choose to do whatever it is that works and suits you - work on that. Learning to control your choices can be difficult, especially at first, but pays great rewards for your happiness and for others around you too! Be fair to yourself and don't sweat it to much if you don't, or can't, "hit the nail on the head" every time. Don't give up though, persistence pays.

And if a temptation you know isn't good for you is robbing your attention from what matters, you can take a deep breath and remove it - and I'm pretty sure you'll find that doing without whatever is distracting you isn't as difficult as you might have thought. I've been through this many times - others who've posted here have too for sure. The emotional (and otherwise) reward you'll receive from doing what you know is "right" should be very satisfying too.

[Tinkerhell]

Lots of good advice above.
I'll second some of it.

You already know that you have a problem with distractions. You apparently don't have the self control at this point to be able to do what needs doing with distractions around.
So… get rid of the distractions.
Either set yourself up in another room or location to do your work. Or get rid of your capacity to play your games & facebook & all that crap in your own room. When you come home do your work BEFORE you even start to look at email & such as that. That BS can and should wait. You're at least taking steps, which is great, you've acknowledged that you've got a problem & you're thinking about getting a tutor. But why depend on someone else to "watch you" to be sure you are doing what you already know needs to be done. You are not a child. You aren't an adult yet but you know what you need to do so do it. Study.

If you need extra encouragement then take a look at the costs for secondary education. I'm in the USA so I'm not sure about things wherever you are but if you want money anytime soon then you should realllllly look at the cost of a 4 or 6 year degree. That shit is crazy expensive over here. Do really well in high school NOW and earn yourself a scholarship and you will be doing more to "make money" for yourself than you could manage in any other legal manner. You won't be able to spend it now but look at it like this: If you want a great, high paying, quality job then your best bet is to have a quality education, Right? That's going to cost upwards of $30 - $50 thousand, way more if you are talking about an MD of some type. Now if you do well in school right now and get some funding… you just made that much money. If you don't do well and still go to school later you will have to get loans. Loans have to be paid back. That means later on, after college, when you have the great job, you're going to be paying those loans (plus interest) back. Instead of spending them on the things you want at that point in your life (which will be different than the hottest tech. Trust me on that.)
The other thing I’d suggest is to stop worrying over your games so much anyway. Games will ALWAYS be around. Get out and DO something. Hang out with friends, meet some girls, get laid (where a HAT!!!) have fun. Don’t break too many laws, and don’t break any big ones. Don’t do too much booze and don’t do any drugs outside of a bit of pot. If you get to liking any of that too much, then quit immediately.
I say all that because you will get to a point where work and life in general probably won’t permit all that sort of thing. It just doesn’t fit in very well after a certain point in your life. Better things come along. And it gives you something nice to look back on later and you won’t have regrets about missing out on them.

Don’t worry too much about where you want to be in 10 years. For about 95% of the folks out there it’s an incremental thing. Focus on getting out of high school with good grades. Then after your first year of college you should have some idea of what you want to get into. Focus on that & keeping good grades then as well. After your second year you really should have an idea of what you want to do.

Come back here in your 3rd year of college & us older farts will tell you everything you need to know for the next 10 years of your life then.

[isaak]

Just back from my holiday..might post some pictures when I can be bothered

First of all I just have to ask what happened to Frankie? when/why did he get banned?

And now: Thank you BlueMak, Cow, Falstaff, Charm_quark, Robert, GigaWatt, swimtech, Tinkerhell and of course poor Frankie.

Your opinions and input has really helped me. I think I wil start with uninstalling all the games off of my computer to remove that distraction. I do not think I can remove the internet because of research/DH I can really relate to Tinkerhell's advice, and that has really helped me to focus and get a good education which I know will help me in the future.

In the words of charm_quark, I will be a man and stick by my decision, and right now that is to put my head down and work hard for just one more year and see where it can get me.

Thank you all so much for the help

[Falstaff]

wait till you have grand children, it gets more interesting, LOL
cheers Isaak