[fornicatarachnid]

It's time once again to consider the candidates for the annual Stella Awards.

The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled
coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonalds. That case inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous successful lawsuits in the United States.

The following are this year's candidates:

1. Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving little toddler was Ms. Robertson's son.

2. A 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hub caps.

3. Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning.
He couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food.
He sued the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the tune of $500,000.

4. Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard.
The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams who was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

5. A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of
Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink and broke her coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor because Ms.Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

6. Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.

7. This year's favorite could easily be Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago motor home.
On his first trip home, having driven onto the freeway, he set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the drivers seat to go
into the back and make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly, the R.V. left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him in the owner's manual that he couldn't actually do this. The jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new motor home.
The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit, just in case there were any other complete morons buying their recreation vehicles.

[Zardon]

pretty insane arent they? as for No 2, well.....

[kinetic]

No.3 makes me mad!

[craig5320]

Well that's restored my faith in the judicial system.

[DriveEuro]

Funny stuff...

[Kelsenellenelvian]

After reading #2 I want to take my children shopping more. God these are insane. This is crap.

[Highwood]

ROFL

Laughed so hard I fell off my chair, unfortunately I think I separated my shoulder when I hit the floor. Forn my lawyer will be contacting you in the morning

[DriveEuro]

Good one Highwood.

[Louie6666]

Originally posted by Highwood
ROLF

Laughed so hard I fell off my chair, unfortunately I think I separated my shoulder when I hit the floor. Forn my lawyer will be contacting you in the morning

you b**t**d I was fine till I saw your post could cope with laughing up untill then my jaw seized!


Zardon Please put disclaimers on every page to prevent this happening again...something like" Laughter Warning Please Where Gag & Seatbelt" this would prevent my Locked jaw & Highwoods shoulder injury...


I love number 7 I want cruise control!

[reno]

Being unamused by this thread as WAS advertised I would be, I demand compensation in the form of Simpson's marathons hosted by driverheaven.net. If you don't comply, I will be forced to call a lawyer and will sue for deceptive advertising (IE: This is not truly a "heaven" if there is no humor provided).

You have 2 days to comply.

[JavaFox]

I am actually more depressed about those things than I am amused.

[Highwood]

Don’t get me wrong Java, the fact that these people were rewarded for acts of extreme stupidity is depressing and maybe even a little bit scary. However the extremely stupid things done by some of the candidates are funny as hell.

I can also understand how Americans might not find this quite as amusing as people from outside America do.

[Vampyromaniac]

I'm with JavaFox

I don't understand how juries can be filled with so many retards, time and time again.

I wish I could see a few examples of these types of lawsuits that didn't succeed.

Oh, and I'd LOVE to peruse some transcripts of the plaintiff's attorney's arguments in the successful cases.
"You have to agree, ladies and gentlemen, that it is immoral and negligent for a nightclub not to provide soft cushions in a designated landing area beneath all windows . . ."

Ffs

[Shaith]

Originally posted by Vampyromaniac
I'm with JavaFox

I don't understand how juries can be filled with so many retards, time and time again.

I wish I could see a few examples of these types of lawsuits that didn't succeed.

Oh, and I'd LOVE to peruse some transcripts of the plaintiff's attorney's arguments in the successful cases.
"You have to agree, ladies and gentlemen, that it is immoral and negligent for a nightclub not to provide soft cushions in a designated landing area beneath all windows . . ."

Ffs

because juries are made up of 12 morons who were too damned stupid to get out of jury duty.

[Vampyromaniac]

bah !!!

[reno]

Yeah, to show you how well the criminal "justice" system works...right here in Wisconsin, this is a true story...

To make this story worse, consider this. Consensual (sp?) sex in Wisconsin is allowed at ages 16 and over.

Guy (17) Girl (16) have been dating for more than a year, they have sex every once in a while...parents know about it, aren't happy with it, but don't make any move to intervene.

Later, the Guy turns 18, girl still 16....UH OH! To celebrate his birthday, Guy gets arrested and thrown in jail. Rape charge brought on by the girls parents, even though the sex the kids were having was consensual.

In court, Girl (now 17) pleads with the jury, crying, begging to let her boyfriend go. DA tells the court that the girl is being manipulated by the boyfriend, judge rules for the jury to dismiss her testimony.

Verdict, guilty of first degree rape. Sentanced to 25 years with no parole, and labeled as a sex offender. Girlfriend visits him in prison every week, where now at 19 and 18, they've expressed the desire to marry while he fights the verdict with an appeal.

Sad huh?

[fornicatarachnid]

That girls parents cant give a shit about their daughter. That is

one sad story Reno