[Ubergrendle]

There was a Henry Rollins poem set to some NIN ambient music floating around napster a few years back...i probably still have it. Anyways it was the perfect description for what it was like being a teenager / early adult and i could relate to the song in so many ways... your opening post reminded me of it, and what it was like to be 18 (ok 21) again.

Worst thing about graduating high school is that all of the sudden all the structure in your life is gone! school is basically the same from the age of 4 to 18, and as crappy as it is, at least its consistent. then all of the sudden its "hey, you're an adult -- what are you going to do with your life you anonymous nothing person?" school doesn't prepare you for 'life' very well, and because everyone else you know is in the same boat you're all confused together ... not very much help from your peers.

My advice is to figure out what you like and do it. This may mean taking a crappy job and working long hours to afford to do something you enjoy... hopefully you'll be able to find a job or school program you enjoy right off the bat. The important thing is not to fill up your empty time with nothing or self-destructive activites. Set a goal for yourself; motivation comes from wanting something better.

I had nasty breakup with a girflriend in university...i was devastated, depressed. Smartest thing I did though was start working 2 part time jobs. At first it was to take my mind away from my depression, but then I also gained job experience, made money, and found new friends. it was constructive. There is nothing more destructive, more useless, and more indulgent than self-loathing. it took me a long time to learn this, and i'm sure you will too.

[BWX]

CDsDontBurn, you came to the right place, you cannot buy this kind of advice! Good luck to you.

[CDsDontBurn]

Originally Posted by Asmoday

Money can buy alot, it can get you the items you want, it pays the bills and gives a ease of mind knowing you don't have to worry about materialistic things.

I find money to be a quick high. I don't think it is the most important thing in life. It is necessary to pay bills like you said, but does not keep me happy.

Originally Posted by BWX

Yeah money can't buy happiness.. but damn man- with that ride you have you should be able to go attract some chicks.. at least get them looking in your direction. hehehe...

I would try to find a girl with as little baggage as possible. 18 or 19 yr olds are good for that..

Call some old friends up- you need to get out and have some fun man!! When I was your age I was having so much fun I almost didn't live through it.

Another thing that isn't so obvious- eat right, exercise.. being healthy physically can have a huge affect on the way you feel mentally, and emotionally.. at least it does for me.

i get all kinds of people looking at my direction all the time.....usually guys though who like my car . But that doesn't mean that girls don't either . It's so hard to find a decent girl these days. The right one can't be found at any bar or anything....it would have to be at something that you like to do.

Originally Posted by Zardon

Not being able to afford a house, living with your parents and finding it harder and harder to deal with their demands on you. Hey im a man now, right?

I feel this is one of the largest factors contributing to my state right now. In order for me to do this, i would have to get rid of my car and buy a junker for me to have my own place.

[BWX]

Originally Posted by CDsDontBurn

I feel this is one of the largest factors contributing to my state right now. In order for me to do this, i would have to get rid of my car and buy a junker for me to have my own place.

Oh man- trade it in, sell it- whatever you have to do.. get your own place, get a room mate or something. It sounds like you are at the point where your father still wants to treat you like a kid just because you live in his house. That's the time to leave. You'll probably get along with him better if you live out on your own..



hehe - I met my g/f in a bar... stranger things have happened man.

[YAYitsAndrew]

You don't meet good girls until you stop looking so hard for them.

edit: Or bad girls if that's your thing

[nuG]

You just have to keep yourself going man. it WILL get better. i have been a depressed person ever since middle school. i was on antidepressents for almost 3 years, graduated high school, started to go to college, and nothing had changed. i realized that the reason things werent getting any better was because of me, and the way i was living my life. i was kicked outta my house, quit my job, lost my gf of 1 and 1/2 years....... but it was like as soon as i hit rock bottom i realized why i was such an unhappy person.

Now i dont have the need for any medication because i have been living a life i have been content with. i hang out with my friends, go to work to make money and pay for school, and enjoy some leisure time when im not doing any at all. the thing is, you need to find your own way to live that makes you happy. if i hit the jackpot a year ago..... i still would have been an unhappy person. you just need to explore a bit. go to the gym, go to a club, get an experience more, even if you dont feel like it. at least you will feel a sense of accomplishment, and i love the way that feels, as do most other people. good luck man, and all the best to you

[PangingJr]

good thing you have said all that out loud CDsDontBurn,
you just have to hear yourself as others hear you.

as you said about the Car and the places to live, i think, if you think the Car is just a mistake then get rid of it.
it won't be a real mistake to get rid of it now. you can buy it again later.
i can't comment about your dad, may be he is/was right all along.

also, Z's second post have a good suggestion or two there.
read it one more time.

[nitrousoxide52]

Find a way to scrounge up a little extra cash, and take a road trip, clear your head.

[Son_of_Thunder]

Originally Posted by Ctrl-Alt-Del

good thing you have said all that out loud CDsDontBurn,
you just have to hear yourself as others hear you.

as you said about the Car and the places to live, i think, if you think the Car is just a mistake then get rid of it.
it won't be a real mistake to get rid of it now. you can buy it again later.
i can't comment about your dad, may be he is/was right all along.

also, Z's second post have a good suggestion or two there.
read it one more time.

Maybe you should just set the car aside for a while now. Maybe find a friend to look after it for a while. Maybe one out of state, or even in Michigan.

[CDsDontBurn]

Originally Posted by Son_of_Thunder

Maybe you should just set the car aside for a while now. Maybe find a friend to look after it for a while. Maybe one out of state, or even in Michigan.

Only if you take over the $500/mo car payment, then sure you can look after the car .

That, and then we'll have to figure out shipping (or me drive out there and then fly back) from California to Michigan.

[CDsDontBurn]

well....i have decided to take a second job to help me out, and keep me busy. I will also start school again in mid august so that will be cool. This time i need to stay focused in school and not slack off like i have before.

[Drakon]

Well good for you, CDB. Hope things works out for the best

[Zardon]

Originally Posted by CDsDontBurn

well....i have decided to take a second job to help me out, and keep me busy. I will also start school again in mid august so that will be cool. This time i need to stay focused in school and not slack off like i have before.

Good man. keep focused, its the driving force behind success in anything you do. I wish you well with the whole thing.

[CDsDontBurn]

thanks guys